Lately, everyone has been saying that Sabrina is a mini me. It's true: We look alike (round faces, curly hair) and in many ways we act alike—we're both strong-willed ("stubborn," some might call it), energetic, feisty, observant, chatty. "High maintenance," someone named Dave might call it.
I can't think of a time when a person's compared Max to me. Not once has anyone said, "Wow, Max has your determination!" (he does) or "Max has your giggle" (ditto). Nobody's really compared Max to Dave, either, except to note they both have good hair (and, hey, I don't underestimate the importance of good hair).
I wish people could look past his disabilities and see the kid there.
Max can't talk so well, but he has my wicked sense of humor; the other day, Dave got annoyed at dinner and shook his head and Max imitated him, a huge grin on his face. Max also has my stubborn streak; when he wants something, it is not easy to deter him (especially when it is purple). He has my can-do spirit; he may have trouble using his hands but he'll try and try and try to pick up something until he does, even if he's literally just hanging onto it by a pinky. And he inherited Dave's sweetness, something I see in his smile.
Listen, I'll take those "Wow, Max is doing really well!" comments any day. They give me a lift. But I'd be extra thrilled to hear someone say, "Wow, Max is so much like you."
I'd love to hear how your kids are like you. Please, share.
Heads up, Tammy over at Praying for Parker, one amazingly grounded mom, just did a post in response to the one I wrote about observing the woman with Down Syndrome at Whole Foods. Tammy has a different take on mourning the past, and looking to the future. Check it out.