Sunday, August 16, 2009

FAQ with myself

So, how's the blog thing going?
Love it. It's just slightly less addictive than drugs. Not that I would know anything about drugs. We saw the movie Julie and Julia tonight. It's about the wonderful writer Julie Powell and her year of making every single recipe in Julia Child's Mastering The Art of French Cooking. She did a blog about it, and suddenly, I was newly inspired to blog. And kinda-sorta inspired to start cooking, too, although blogging seems so much easier than French cooking. I've messed up hardboiled eggs and, sadly, I am not joking.

Do I really write posts so late at night?
Yup. It's the only time I have. Once in a while, I set them to go up at a certain time, to keep things consistent. Just in case, you know, there are people who are sitting by their computers at 12:22 a.m. breathlessly awaiting my latest post.

Do I write all of my own posts?
Of course, although Britney Spears has ghostwritten a few.

What's the hardest part about doing a blog?
Wondering who's reading it. I have a bunch of readers and not nearly as many commenters (hi, lurkers!). Comments make you feel like you're not blogging into the void. The other hard part of blogging is resisting impulses to joke about my mother-in-law, though I've done a pretty good job of holding back.

Am I really as upbeat as I seem?
Not quite, which is why I use Blogger's "Personality Plus!" widget. It automatically infuses my blog with humor and optimism and jokes about my mother-in-law, which I have to go back and delete.

What's kinda disappointing about blogging?
Feeling like parents of typical kids ignore this blog. And not hearing from Britney Spears.

Is Max really doing as well as I make it seem on this blog?
Pretty much. I mean, listen, the boy has cerebral palsy. His right hand? He doesn't use it that much. It's a struggle for him to articulate words. He can't chew solids so well. He's not yet potty-trained. He drools. These are the realities of his condition. But look at him. He walks. He communicates. He is bright. He is determined. He defies the doomsaying doctors at the NICU every single day of his existence. Actually, every single minute.

Why does my husband so rarely comment on this blog?
That is an excellent question, if I do say so myself. Dave?

Are my kids as cute in person as they appear in photos?
OMG! Y-E-S!!!!!!!

What's my favorite post?
Probably A Bill of Rights For Parents of Kids With Special Needs. And the post where I offered my mother-in-law as a giveaway, although nobody took her.

What scares me about blogging?
That someday, Max will go back and read these posts and feel that I invaded his privacy. That said, if he gets to the point where he is able to read, and he is able to use his hands well enough so that he can physically isolate his middle finger and give me the finger for violating his privacy, I will be the happiest girl in the world.


  1. Thanks for stopping by...and commenting! ;)
    I sometimes have that thought that I'm invading my kids privacy with my blog. I try to be careful, well, as you can see, not with refraining from posting pictures, but with the details of their lives.
    Max is those dark eyes!

  2. I totally stay up at 12:22 am waiting for your posts. Well, that, and I work the night shift and you never fail to encourage me (or entertain me at the very least)!

  3. I totally stay up waiting for your blog. You know I do. I'm not stalking you...swear. Although I have to say - you looked really pretty today.

    Your fear is mine too - that our kids will be mad for all we wrote about them. :-( Hopefully, though, it will also make them realize the intense love we have for them and they'll forgive us!!

    The countdown ... not long now until Duke!!!!!!! :-)

  4. I haven't been here in some time and want to catch up. And it turns out to be a good day with today's post! And, for the record, I don't think you're exploiting Max with your writing. I think that you're actually glorifying him. Really.

  5. Yeah, sometimes it does feel like a party just for special parents, but I figure if that's who wants to read, then fine. I suspect that non-special parents are the ones that read and don't comment because they feel like they don't have anything to contribute--not true, but that's my suspicion.

    I also wish that I could spell, but alas, three years with the dyslexics really did me in.

  6. Barbara from BostonAugust 17, 2009 at 1:12 AM

    Allow me to flip you the bird now for Max so you don't have so long to wait. Seriously! Having worked with special needs children and adults, let me put in my 5 cents worth. Your kids will recognize the love affection emotional involvement pride and wistfulness in all of your posts, and respond accordingly. Besides all moms seem to have potty pictures and tushy pictures of their kids. What can invade privacy more than that?

  7. I do not await your next post at 12:22... I just happen to be up at 3AM... LOL

    You don't really blog from a Mac do you? You use use it's photo because it's sexy? :)

    Right hand? Well time to get you a right handed companion dog. They make them especially for kids like Max. I know left handed, and right handed dogs. ;-)

    It's true, we love your blog. And I don't think Max will mind reading his blog some day. As long as it helps other kids and parents understand more about him and his disability. - Maybe he'll turn it into a book - and maybe he'd let his mother have ?10%? LOL

    Keep up the good work guys... :-)

  8. Hi, I found your blog through 5 minutes for special needs.

    I also have a Max, with special needs. You Max sounds like he's doing great and beating all odds.

    I just wanted to say hi from one Max mom to another.


  9. I read your blog a lot of times when I am coming in from work. I work at a twenty four hour joint and work all kinds of crazy hours! So yeah, I am one of those people who are reading at three and sometimes four in the morning! Or six thirty! It just depends on the schedule!

  10. The non-commenters drive me crazy too. Or how I can go from 16 comments to 4 in one day.

  11. Hi,

    I have been lurking for a while now. Your blog is wonderful and my favorite post was the bill of rights for parents. I also have a daughter with special needs, so it is nice to read the blogs of other parents in the same situation.

  12. I read your blog it! And your sense of humour. And your kids are super adorable.

    The lack of comments bothers me too. I really have no idea how many people are reading mine. I'm fairly new to this blogging world but loving it so far.

  13. I'm a lurker, but I love your blog! We lurkers sometimes don't know what to say but we do appreciate all the hard work you put into this. You have a gorgeous family and you are a wonderful writer.


  14. I am not a lurker- just often a lack of timer! LOL!

    I too hope that Max can get the middle finger isolated! Go Max!

  15. Yeah, where is Dave? The Globetrotting Groom only comments twice a year so don't feel bad!!!

  16. If I would have been reading your blog, I would have accepted your MIL. My kids could really use a grandma. I would like to just once be able to say that my kids are with grandma. (I'm a single mom and both of my parents have died).

    If you decide to offer her again, let her know I have 3 great kids. Olivia is 10 1/2 and way smart; Ruthie is 8 1/2 and can make a friend with anybody of any age; and Luke is 6 1/2 with ASD.

    Oh well, maybe next time.

  17. I'm one of your many lurkers. love, love, love your blog. It brightens my day. I have a little guy who's got CP. It's soooooo very nice to hear all the amazing things Max does on a daily basis. It give me a lot of hope for my little guy. love, Susan

  18. This is Dave !!!!!

    We chat about the Blog all night, and I get a chance to read it before the entire I consider myself above the rest of the public comments ::00......

    So anyway I love you all the time !!!!!!!

  19. Ellen,
    I am cracking up as I write this!! Great stuff! You do a great job and Max probably won't even care, UNLESS THAT IS, you start gathering a following of his friends, in high school! I appreciate your sense of humor about so many things that can drag us down as parents of s.n. kids. I remember a comment by Josh Blue, the guy who won "last comic standing".. (he has CP,too) He talked about "THE PALSY PUNCH" ( you know, never knowing where it's coming from until.....P-O-W! From tight limbs and all) and Carl and I laughed until we almost died! B/c Faith is notorious for "throwing punches" when you least expect it! We need people like you and Josh to keep us going! XOXOXO Candace

  20. Mom of a typical kid that regularly reads your blog here:)

  21. I love reading your blog. I am not waiting up til crazy hours or anything, but I enjoy your posts. : ) You have made me laugh out loud and you have made me cry. All in all, seeing what Max has accomplished gives me hope for my little girl. So thanks for sharing him with us.

  22. I'm a devoted lurker with 2 non-special needs kids. I found your blog through Schuylers Monster. I love your writing. Though I may not be a typical reader, I have learned a lot about kids with special needs and about parenting too. I don't have anything profound to say, but I love to hear about Max and Sabrina.


  23. Loved this, and related to most. (Julie Powell's blog got me to start blogging, too.)

    The potty training? Ugh. I know.

  24. Ok, here is another comment from a lurker (you called us out!). I LOVE your blog and your writing. It makes me laugh and I find myself thinking about something you wrote hours after I've read it - like when I running or something. I have two boys, one w. low tone etc. I can relate to many of your posts and experiences but love hearing your take on things. Keep up the great work.

  25. Isn't that the truth about readers vs. commenters? I swear I look at my numberes sometimes and think what the heck? Although my family tell me its them, and they just like to read.

    Anyway You know how much I love your site and visit all the time...def no problem with me being a lurker.

    BTW Regan didn't fully potty train until age 7....and boy did we celebrate!

  26. I have the same problem with comments hint

  27. Thank you for all the nice words, they mean a lot. You lurkers are a surprisingly articulate bunch! :)

    Everyone go show AZ Chapman some love right now!

    Word to Dave: nice try, buddy, but no excuses!!! xo

  28. By the time Max (or Sabrina) can read this blog they'll be searching the internet with mircochips implanted in their brain. I think invading their privacy will be the least of your problems :)

  29. OK, I confess, I'm a lurker :-) but I promise not a stalker! I've followed your blog for while and think you a fabulously witty yet heartfelt writer and needless to say a wonderful mom and advocate for Max. You are NOT writing into the void, I am out here, so keep it up!

  30. LOL @ Dave. My hubby has NEVER read my blog. That I know of.

  31. I am the momma of three "typical" kiddo's. I love to read blogs of special needs families because it gives us a different perspective. I do not know how to teach my children. I grew up in a family that simply said "Don't stare" to me. I want my children to have compassion for people different than them and understand how to interact with s.n. kiddos on the playground rather than avoid them...


  32. I think your blog is totally relevant for all parents (not just those with children with special needs). You write from the heart, your stories are beautiful -sometimes humorous, sometimes very deep.

  33. I've been missing those Britney blog posts. Guess she's been too busy to check in lately.....

    Seriously though, you know I love your blog already.

    I have that same concern about blog privacy and how BC will feel about it when he grows up. I hope that instead of seeing it as an invasion of privacy, my son sees it as a great record all his amazing achievements.

    And seeing as I have the world's worst memory, it's probably the most accurate record we'll have too ;-).


Thanks for sharing!

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