Wednesday, September 19, 2018

11 parenting sins I haven't committed

Today is the Day of Atonement and, as usual, I do not lack material. A partial list: I admit to telling Max that Disney World was temporarily closed so he would stop bugging me about going. Baaaaad. I have been glutinous, polishing off my children's beloved cookie dough ice-cream late at night. So wrong. I have pilfered plastic straws from fast-food places when they are the thick kind that enable Max to practice drinking. I've had improper thoughts involving swear words when Max has let out screeches, two sins in one.

Then there are the perceived transgressions parents have, especially those of us who are raising children with extra needs, that IMO do not qualify as actual sins. This is what I won't be asking forgiveness for this year:

I committed no sin in forgetting to send in various school forms throughout the year or neglecting to sign the kids up for various stuff. My family should actually be glad, given the vast amount of things I remember to do, that my brain has not yet exploded. Come to think of it, certain members of my family should be asking forgiveness for certain eye rolls that happened after said stuff was forgotten.

I committed no sin in getting frustrated with Max for refusing to use his iPad to communicate. Max often prefers to use his own voice with us. But even me, his good old mom, can’t understand everything he says. And so, when he keeps repeating he same word, phrase or sentence and I have no idea what he means, I tend to exasperatedly say “Max, use your iPad!” and when he still refuses to type out what he's saying I will exasperatedly point out, "Max! If you don't use your iPad, I cannot understand you!!!" Exasperation etc.

I committed no sin in not doing every single one of the exercises the physical, occupational and speech therapists have recommended for Max—just not humanly possible.

I committed no sin in pretending to still be asleep in the morning when one of my children asks "Mommy, are you up?" 

I committed no sin in being one of the world’s more pathetic, UberEats codependent cooks or enabling Sabrina's addiction to Snyder's Hot Buffalo Wing Pretzel Pieces, which leave her hands orange-y. I nourish my children in other ways.

I committed no sin in not volunteering to be Class Mom.

I committed no sin in being glad about Max and Sabrina going to sleepaway camp this summer. It’s good for him. It’s good for me and Dave. Yay.

I committed no sin in being the most persistent, pushy, won't-take-no-for-an-answer parent to make sure my children get what they need—in academia, with bus transportation, with snagging doctor appointments, with getting the insurance company to pay for Max's therapies and treatments. Speaking of which...

I committed no sin for losing it with the insurance company reps, who would test the patience of G-d herself. (Some, however, may have some atoning to do.)

I committed no sin in refusing to indulge Max's obsession with yet another trip to Home Depot to furnish his fantasy Orlando luxury home. Dave, however, always agrees to go, and for that he will be getting extra holy credit today, I'm pretty sure.

I committed no sin in yelling at Max when his behavior got out of control. On occasion, I yelled at my other children, too. Inclusion!

1 comment:

Thanks for sharing!

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