Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Max needs a driver's license. Plus, potty-training armageddon is near

Last Sunday, Sabrina and I were cruising around. She had strep throat, and I took her out for ice-cream because of course that and antibiotics are the best possible cure, but mostly Mud Pie ice-cream.

My cell rang; it was Dave.

"Can you come pick us up?" he asked.

Max had decided to pedal his tractor into town. Mind you, it's a good half mile from our house. And then he kept right on going past town. He was showing no sign of letting up, and Dave figured he was going to run out of steam at any second.

The tractor, circa 2009

I found them. Max didn't look very pleased to see me. In fact, his exact greeting was "Noooooooo!" He didn't want to stop. We hauled him into the car, looking to all the world like we were kidnapping him off the street, and then Dave told me about the excitement I'd missed.

Max had decided he was driving not a tractor but a REAL car. And he tried to drive smack in the middle of the street, along with the other moving vehicles. Dave finally convinced him that his plastic John Deere kiddie tractor is not an actual car.

Then Max decided he needed to park his fake real car in a parking lot in town. He drove into a spot and hung out as a policeman watched, smiling (evidently, idling in a plastic car is not yet considered a violation in our town). Some guy drove up and waited for the spot; Dave finally lured Max away with the promise of a milkshake.

So, I'm thinking of getting Max a new set of wheels, and it's all about bribery. We are going to immerse ourselves in potty training in two weekends. As in, we're dedicating an entire weekend to staying home and being all potty, all the time. No Pull-ups, just underwear and lots of drinking (water, not beer, although I might need a couple of glasses of wine). Plastic shower liners on the floor. Plus some amazing, absolutely irresistible prize-bribe. Like this:

It fits kids up to age 7 but since Max is well under the weight limit of 65 pounds,  I'm figuring he'll be fine. So what if we have to take out a second mortgage to pay for it. If it inspires Max to go potty, it will be worth every cent.

I just keep picture Max in it, jetting away from us to, like, Florida.

But at least he'd be potty trained.


  1. You go, girl! Potty training for us entailed a lot of naked tushies in the house, a lot of m&m's and a lot of tears on everyone's part. Be strong!!

  2. Good Luck! Max is a hoot, as always.

  3. Mustn't show this to Ben, he'll be sooooooooooooooooo jealous! So far a pair of cars underpants has been enough :)
    cheers and good luck with the training
    Anne, Sophie and Ben

  4. I think your little bribe will work! And it's not so bad. I say whatever works, right? And we know Max is crazy for Cars 2, so I'd venture to say you've got it in the bag. :)

  5. Love this! Especially the idling in the parking lot. It made my morning!

  6. I will be following "Potty-training Armageddon" posts religiously, and praying for success. E is 5 and still nowhere near being potty trained (*sob*).

    As for the car that you say bribery, how is it any different than a boss telling an employee that if he/she sells "X" amount, they will get a bonus? It's not a bribe, it's...INCENTIVE!! You're teaching him the importance of setting a goal and working toward it.

    We use "incentives" a lot in our house. ;)

    -Julia O'C

    (Sorry for the anonymous posting. Google's new "privacy" settings have me a little freaked out.)

  7. Awesome story! I love the expression on Max's face in your photo of him in the tractor. Look forward to the toilet training chronicles! Hope Sabrina is feeling better soon.

  8. Good Luck with the Potty Training. We went Naked, then just underware, locked at home. Thank goodness Ryans School was on board with it as well. I can say now that there were many tears and I almost gave up. Look at me now. Ryan is potty trained and is helping with his little sister. Can someone explain how you tell a 3 year old girl she cannot stand and go the same way her big brother goes. Good luck, and yes, bribery helps. Lots of wine as well.

  9. so cute! i'm sure max will just love his new set of wheels.

    good luck on the potty training. i'll be waiting to see the tips you have afterwards. our son is almost five and is not completely trained either, so i'm hoping to learn from your wisdom!

  10. Good luck. Just make sure he fits in the car. My son had the same car...but he grew too tall for his long legs to fit (he's 9 1/2 now).

    Max is my hero and an inspiration to my young CP patient..ok so his mother.

  11. Haha! You've picked out one incredible incentive for Max.

    I think Max is going to be determined to make this happen. :)

  12. I'd do whatever you wanted me to do for that car!

  13. Thanks for sharing with us, this is a great story, Max will be okay, I know it. Btw good luck with the potty training.

  14. http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000FOXSZK/ref=noref?ie=UTF8&s=miscellaneous&psc=1

    CARS underwear? Might be a motivator!!!

  15. Thanks for all the encouragement. I will definitely overshare. :)

    Felicia, instead of spending an evening scouring online for undies, I could have just waited for you to send me a link, which you always do!!! Happily, I found good ones on sale at Kohls.com, and I bought a whole bunch. PLUS Cars 2 stickers. It all has to be Cars 2, not the regular Cars. He notices if the "2" isn't in the logo.

  16. That is soooo awesome!! Good luck. Can't wait to hear about it.


Thanks for sharing!