tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post6892864782388723264..comments2024-03-17T12:02:12.410-04:00Comments on Love That Max : Sometimes we are THAT special needs familyEllen Seidmanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01433429847255621203noreply@blogger.comBlogger48125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-83123720127514394472012-03-04T16:19:33.625-05:002012-03-04T16:19:33.625-05:00OH my! I just discovered your blog and love it! So...OH my! I just discovered your blog and love it! So I've been reading through so many posts!<br /><br />I am not the mother of a special needs child but an older sister- and Your adventures in trying to eat out- remind me alot of my own family trying to take my brother out. <br /><br />Other's are right we are all "THAT" family at any given time.<br /><br />This one time shortly before I moved for college. We took my brother out to his favourite restuarant at the time. He sat through the meal, ate nicely, it was amazing. <br /><br />At that time we had been teaching him at home to clear the table after eating. So after he was finished eating he gets up and starts clearing the table with the waitress! my parents were so embarassed. But the waitress and hostess were gold! Even though it was probably against restaurant policy they let my brother help clear not only the dishes from our table, but the one next to it! <br /><br />He felt so important because he was a "helper" and helped my family have a decent meal out. They must of told all the staff. Because the next time my parents took him there- the staff let him help clear the tables again!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-33441774936925180672011-03-28T21:53:12.931-04:002011-03-28T21:53:12.931-04:00You know what you want and what works for your fam...You know what you want and what works for your family. The skillet in the bag is priceless. If someone can carry ranch dressing in their purse, then a skillet is totally dioable. I purchased a tiny frying pan from TJMaxx/Home goods for an Xmas gift for a couple of kids who like to cook. I t was in the kitchen gadget section. I think it was small enough to fit in a coat pocket. Food for thought.Musings from Mehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13252283843903445777noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-86509692664051557392010-08-18T09:24:54.051-04:002010-08-18T09:24:54.051-04:00Shame on you for not packing a skillet LOL. If I ...Shame on you for not packing a skillet LOL. If I can carry a Magic Bullet blender in my bag and whip it out at a Pub when they claimed they couldn't blend up a meal I reckon you can get a skillet - I wonder if they body holsters for skillets...Gina @ Inky Ed!http://inkyed.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-16883797365755908082010-08-17T21:02:34.769-04:002010-08-17T21:02:34.769-04:00Jacqui, yes, we definitely have short-term memorie...Jacqui, yes, we definitely have short-term memories for this sort of thing, otherwise we'd never try again.<br /><br />Ms. Crabass and Maya, your story about the kids throwing stuff at the restaurant reminded me of a story when Max was about two. We were dining out, and Max grabbed a dinner roll and tossed it. This was a BIG deal since had so much trouble grasping, let alone throwing. Anyway, the roll landed on the table next to us and without thinking, Dave and I cheered. You should have seen the looks we got!!!!<br /><br />And Pam? That is an awesome story. Made my day.Ellen Seidmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01433429847255621203noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-83967321875926245712010-08-17T16:03:17.396-04:002010-08-17T16:03:17.396-04:00I am a single mom, divorced when I was pregnant wi...I am a single mom, divorced when I was pregnant with my son. My daughter had sensory sensitivities when she was small, and my son was born with Down syndrome. Their grandfather knew how much they enjoyed eating at restaurants with him during visits so he would send a check every so often just so I could take them out. On my own. Just me and them. <br />But, on days when one or all of us was *on the verge* or over it, I would pack them up and take them out to eat. <br />One particularly stressful day we were sitting at a booth with one in a high chair and one in a booster seat and I was keeping my eyes on my plate so I would not see whatever they might be doing with the food on theirs. Miraculously, we had five minutes of peace and I was eating my food while it was still hot and fresh from the kitchen. <br />And then along comes an athletic looking young couple who wants to say something to me. Oh dear!<br />But the young man introduces himself and says he just wanted to say how much he admired me; he grew up with a brother who has Down syndrome and his brother made him the success he is today. He was so glad that his mom gave his brother every opportunity and gave him the opportunity to know his brother.<br />He went on to say that he admired my patience, and I quickly glanced over to see what my children might have been doing to earn what he evaluated as my patience. <br />With his eyes on me he was saying "I know how patient you must be" and both my kids looked at him and shook their heads 'No' with sweet sincerity. <br />It was so funny I looked back to the young man to see whether he enjoyed their silent commentary but he had kept his eyes on me ~ and really lit up since he had finally elicited a big smile from me. <br />I motioned toward my kids so he would see them now shaking their heads more solemnly "no" but he missed it completely, and concluded by saying he was amazed at their good manners in a restaurant. <br />His companion had been beaming at him during the whole conversation so she did not catch my kids' two cents either. <br />When we left the house, I had told my kids I had absolutely no patience left and we *had* to go out. <br />I figured it would be better to be 'that family' in public than to absolutely lose my mind at home. And then they were perfect angels at the restaurant?!? <br />So for the first time I became aware that sometimes we could be THAT special needs family ~ or at least, seem to be.Pam Whttp://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art32533.aspnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-90928242798473231222010-08-17T14:30:14.913-04:002010-08-17T14:30:14.913-04:00I just remembered something: the time Leo (Down sy...I just remembered something: the time Leo (Down syndrome, he was then about 2 1/2) was in an obsessive take off his shoes and socks everywhere phase.<br /><br />We were at an Italian restaurant and he threw a sock and it landed in the dish of olive oil (for dipping bread). Thank goodness it was on OUR table.<br /><br />I was pregnant with #2 at the time, had wretched morning sickness, no sense of humor and wanted to crawl under the table and hide. Now however, I can laugh about it!Mayahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13640322135525371672noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-10543103535020864522010-08-17T09:48:02.026-04:002010-08-17T09:48:02.026-04:00Wonderful story- excellent getting it done. If I ...Wonderful story- excellent getting it done. If I see you wandering about town with a skillet in your purse I will give you a high five. <br />Because my twins are NPO, the one thought that always comes to mind when we eat out is "do people wonder why I'm not ordering food for, or feeding, them?". <br />I mean, people mostly get they're disabled by their wheelchairs (and that usually gets us a nice, out-of-the-way spot) but I wonder what they think when my "typical" daughter is eating a giant hot fudge sundae and her older brothers aren't interested. My boys turn their heads like it's poison.<br /><br />Our dining-out always ends in one of the twins clearing everything off the table. Once, the twins took their shirts off and threw them on the floor and we nonchalantly cheered (one has moderately severe CP). Shoes always come off, and fly across the room. We are definitely *that* family.Ms. Crabasshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17202183274474341392noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-71656591402393474382010-08-17T08:01:45.968-04:002010-08-17T08:01:45.968-04:00Wow! I'm no 41!
We are so THAT family. But w...Wow! I'm no 41!<br /><br />We are so THAT family. But what I love even more is how you have automatic amnesia so no matter how painful the meal went, you are so willing to go through it again cause you never know, it might be different next time.Jacquihttp://www.terriblepalsy.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-43483005074981361682010-08-17T07:38:30.096-04:002010-08-17T07:38:30.096-04:00It is nice and reassuring to hear that a whole lot...It is nice and reassuring to hear that a whole lot of us are THAT family sometimes!!! And Debra, YESSSSSSSS to this: "Until society accepts that accommodations need to be made no matter how off the wall they sound when requested, we will always be those special needs family's."<br /><br />Hollee, I know there are plenty of families with typical kids who can be THAT family, too! Thx for that reminder, and loved the Soleil Moon Frye story!<br /><br />Terena, I have not yet totally learned to ignore the stares. Maybe someday.<br /><br />I probably should bring more props for the kids. I wrote about taking Max out for dinner once over at 5 Minutes for Special Needs, and someone suggested pipe cleaners. Really smart idea! CJ, coloring materials definitely helpful, too!<br /><br />Felicia, thanks for the thoughts on where to get skillets, I will be sure to get Max a new one today, and perhaps a bunch for his birthday. !!!! Living in the NY area, yes, carrying one in my person could definitely come in handy for a would-be mugger, though Mace is maybe a wee bit lighter.<br /><br />If this post inspired any of you to be more upfront about making requests for your child, I will be a very happy girl. OR you can just take me along to your next pancake outing, k?Ellen Seidmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01433429847255621203noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-60118787652869110282010-08-17T00:26:19.161-04:002010-08-17T00:26:19.161-04:00Yep, that's us, the loud family making a big m...Yep, that's us, the loud family making a big mess. I've learned to go with the flow, be polite, ignore the stares and leave a big tip. If they get pissy I get bitchy, but usually everyone is really nice.Renahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15911608453762091207noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-20134823064730760532010-08-16T21:47:37.124-04:002010-08-16T21:47:37.124-04:00Hi Anonymous again. The circus has come to town,,,...Hi Anonymous again. The circus has come to town,,,,,everyday.<br /><br />You are not alone!<br /><br />by the way, I mentioned that I was new to this blog thing. I gave the wrong blog address. <br /><br />We just started http://everydaywithopie.blogspot.com/<br /><br />Hope you can check it out. I'm just getting started and have 21 years to cover......<br /><br />Thanks again for your blog. Saw it in my newest GH subscription.Jeanninenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-58269630466525277712010-08-16T21:05:31.522-04:002010-08-16T21:05:31.522-04:00Yes, we too, are "that" family. I like ...Yes, we too, are "that" family. I like to call us the traveling circus. Wherever we go we seem to draw eyes towards us. Wasn't so bad when my son Brandon was younger, but now that he is an adult his oddities get more looks. Just signed us up for our first blog if you want to check it out. I have no idea what I am doing so bear with me. We're at: Life with Opie<br />I'll try to blog at least every few days. I have many stories to re-tell from the past 21 years.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-58132036361166760782010-08-16T20:51:55.936-04:002010-08-16T20:51:55.936-04:00LOVED this post.
Love your take on being "...LOVED this post. <br /><br />Love your take on being "that" family.<br /><br />Love how you approach the little obstacles of life. (Feeling up Siennas - pure genius!)<br /><br />Love that you got to eat your pancakes. ...And that you described them. Mmm.<br /><br />Oh! And LUUUUUUUUUH-VE your purse. Awesome color. Perfect for skillets. :-)Kritter Krithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00909281895847078917noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-71778485276912092542010-08-16T20:19:42.073-04:002010-08-16T20:19:42.073-04:00LOL that made me lsugh so hard. I dont know how ma...LOL that made me lsugh so hard. I dont know how many times i have had to plan ahead to go somewhere as simple as mcdonalds. it is those days i sit back and remember and now someday i will miss them when he gets older.stephanie coxnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-47548612765923345282010-08-16T17:30:55.814-04:002010-08-16T17:30:55.814-04:00@ Hollee Temple, not to threadjack but my son has ...@ Hollee Temple, not to threadjack but my son has red hair and he gets an enormous amount of attention so three redheads together must be like a traveling circus--insane, but in a fun way!<br /><br />Regarding being "that" family, people with "typical" kids can be "that" family too, and in the most obnoxious way possible. There's a restaurant I go to regularly that had a celebrity guest--Soleil Moon Frye (okay, pretty C-list, but anyway...), and she literally let her kids run wild. It got so bad that the owner went over to their table and threatened to throw the entire family out of the restaurant if Frye didn't control her kids. Frye Tweeted later that day, "Can anyone ever really control children?" Oy. <br /><br />Simply asking for a few accommodations for your special needs kiddo doesn't make you THAT family. It makes you a mom who's doing the best for her family while also trying to be considerate of the service workers and customers around her. That sounds good to me!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-80309501613273300522010-08-16T17:04:05.073-04:002010-08-16T17:04:05.073-04:00Ha! We eat bfast at the same restaurant EVERY DAY ...Ha! We eat bfast at the same restaurant EVERY DAY (except school days) and the waitress just goes to the kitchen door and says "Kate's Here!" and they fix everything exactly like she likes it: fried egg, over medium, corner biscuit, a BIG bowl of gravy even tho she won't eat it, sliced tomatoes to dip in strawberry jelly, maybe a bowl of marchmallows to dip in gravy for breakfast dessert. The only variable is whether she'll have milk/coffee in particular style of cup (with scissors to cut off the straw) or tea with one slice of lemon. They love us, we love them, they get great tips, we get great food. Everyone wins, particularly Kate since she actually eats something!Lesleynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-54279036065452100832010-08-16T16:13:22.739-04:002010-08-16T16:13:22.739-04:00A big chocolate pancake flavoured Yes! We
Are very...A big chocolate pancake flavoured Yes! We<br />Are very much the same, although I always<br />Take coloring pens and lots of paper for Amy<br />Whenever we go out for a meal. Amy is<br />Autistic.<br /><br />A fabulous post.<br />CJ xxAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-76063712543522681292010-08-16T16:01:17.432-04:002010-08-16T16:01:17.432-04:00Love this post. And yes, you married a bright one!...Love this post. And yes, you married a bright one! I think we're not that family often enough. Because our son was diagnosed late, we often felt more self-conscious about what we perceived as our inability to control him than we do now we know he's autistic! And we're still not that good at thinking in advance what needs to be asked before we go somewhere. I think I'll take a leaf out of your book and try to become more like 'that family'.Sandrinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10229404784641370601noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-74799833111486784642010-08-16T14:59:09.836-04:002010-08-16T14:59:09.836-04:00on the rare occassion we do go out, with the kids,...on the rare occassion we do go out, with the kids, we are that family that everyone stares at, lol. but I still carry around a huge diaper bag and I load it to the brim. sometimes I bring another canvas bag, along with my own purse. to make sure it goes as smooth as possible.<br />I love how you checked to see if a skillet would fit in your purse. waht we do for our children's happiness!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-69644260095920139102010-08-16T13:51:26.577-04:002010-08-16T13:51:26.577-04:00This had me laughing and crying right along with y...This had me laughing and crying right along with you and I could very much relate.<br /><br />A few months ago we tried going to a new restaurant. Our son Leo (age 6, Down syndrome) took two steps inside and declared it "too loud" even though the place had just opened and we were literally the first customers of the day!<br /><br />After a good twenty minutes of patient coaxing, Leo joined us at the table and proceeded to eat his entire meal with one hand over his ear. We didn't need much special accomodation that day but it was nice that no one made us feel weird and they were all smiles.<br /><br />Refreshing to hear all these stories, I certainly know I'm not alone in theory, but nice to get the reminder.<br /><br />And as you know, a sense of humor really helps!Mayahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13640322135525371672noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-31075103132812966682010-08-16T11:40:52.661-04:002010-08-16T11:40:52.661-04:00Ellen -- the thing(s) you did that are important f...Ellen -- the thing(s) you did that are important for all of us that are "that" family is the prep work you did - make a friendly phone call, talk politly to the hostess, double team when necessary (e.g. take Max outside). You let them know HOW they could help you, you didn't assume that they would know. <br /><br />If we go to a real sit-down (menues at the table) type of place we tend to go for an early dinner to avoid the crowd.Janetnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-14674708372413954382010-08-16T11:28:43.968-04:002010-08-16T11:28:43.968-04:00We were THAT family not too long ago. We were in ...We were THAT family not too long ago. We were in Branson, MO and stopped at the Olive Garden for dinner. One of our son's is disabled and has Epilepsy and requires a number of meds in the AM and PM. We walked in during dinner rush and they told us there would be a wait. My wife asked if there was an open chair somewhere she could sit and feed/administer meds for Kade. They hostess declined to help us find a chair so we sat in the middle of the foyer with Kade in his wheelchair and started to open pills and feed Kade which can be a site. Once they saw what we are doing they found us a chair around the corner to use.Joshhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04607442465410212466noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-33977543773329638082010-08-16T10:26:02.569-04:002010-08-16T10:26:02.569-04:00Ellen,
I am not part of "that" famil...Ellen,<br /> I am not part of "that" family, my kids are all grown, but have become "that" teacher with "that" class! We weekly take our students with multiple disabilities out into the community and pancakes are on of our favorites. I am very shy, usually, but I have learned to assume that they will give us the table we want, all the napkins we will need and move all the chairs away so we can fit our wheelchairs in. Thankfully no one has ever stopped me, I think I scare them :) <br />LisaAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11051482989794391914noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-62018008831549178142010-08-16T10:23:04.033-04:002010-08-16T10:23:04.033-04:00We've been THAT family before more than once. ...We've been THAT family before more than once. Usually my Max is pretty good when I bring him out to eat but if he is <i>too</i> hungry the waiting for food can be really hard for him. Especially if he notices other people have food and he doesn't.Jennyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08986080963534940625noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-8418389297646368812010-08-16T09:22:35.964-04:002010-08-16T09:22:35.964-04:00We are always THAT family!! ;)We are always THAT family!! ;)Tiffanyhttp://www.elastamom.comnoreply@blogger.com