tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post6052786252442461691..comments2024-03-17T12:02:12.410-04:00Comments on Love That Max : You want another baby, your husband doesn't: Group therapyEllen Seidmanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01433429847255621203noreply@blogger.comBlogger53125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-17834067674969689042019-12-09T17:25:29.438-05:002019-12-09T17:25:29.438-05:00Im there with you my little boy will be 3 the end ...Im there with you my little boy will be 3 the end of December 2.5 years ago my husband told me he wanted another we went through some fought times and 3 weeks ago he told me he no longer wants anymore so I’m stuck bc I love him to death and want life with him and only him but I want another baby and he’s dead set absolutely no more idk what to do at this point he knows I will always have this void in my<br />Life bc that’s what I want but don’t know how to cope with the fact that we’re not gonna have anymore our son wasn’t even planned Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14243456257250566906noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-61450824735369978412017-06-15T18:07:27.739-04:002017-06-15T18:07:27.739-04:00I would go for it! Especially when you and your h...I would go for it! Especially when you and your hubby are on the same page. I have three children and would love a fourth but I feel I've waited too long :(. I'm 37 now, 38 in three months. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-4473319999719771242017-06-15T18:03:00.531-04:002017-06-15T18:03:00.531-04:00I have had these same feelings over the last two m...I have had these same feelings over the last two months especially. I have a 13 year old, 10 year old and 7 year old. I just wish I would have had them a couple years ago, because now I'm 37 (38 in three months) I think it's too late for me to have another baby. I've been feeling so sad about it :(. At this point I'm not sure how to deal with these feelings or get past them....Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-45018861240358267742017-03-17T23:05:43.622-04:002017-03-17T23:05:43.622-04:00My situation is a little different... I have a dau...My situation is a little different... I have a daughter... Who's almost 21 and he had a son that 16. We had talked about having a child together before we got married and we both wanted one. My daughter wants me to have one.... But now after almost 9 years of marriage he doesn't want one anymore!!! He says we are too old..41... That we fight too much and that we can't afford it. His son has diabetes and a gluten allergy. I feel like he lied to me just to get me to marry him!!! He knows how much I have always wanted a second child!!! He says we are ready for grandchildren not babies!!!! His son wasn't planned and he was forced to marry her.... He wanted to marry me.... I just don't know what to do and really feel at a loss!!! I'm running out of time to have one at all!!!! :( Please help!!!!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05868153014607560981noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-74327278296651071262017-01-16T18:21:51.505-05:002017-01-16T18:21:51.505-05:00Part Two
Oh I knew I would have two children. Su...Part Two <br /><br />Oh I knew I would have two children. Susan was only one when I became pregnant. I didn't have the experience you did Ellen. My first year of being a parent was easy. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04571502921349141039noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-83730756479389676412017-01-16T18:10:48.385-05:002017-01-16T18:10:48.385-05:00Same. I didn't enjoy being the last part of my...Same. I didn't enjoy being the last part of my pregnancy with Daniel because I was filled with worries about his health. My first pregnancy was fine. Looking back I am not the same person I was. My longing for a third is there still but I'm undecided and on the fence about that. My son was diagnosed with Spina Bifida in utero. <br /><br />Leah Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04571502921349141039noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-19848507068058175192017-01-04T20:13:34.309-05:002017-01-04T20:13:34.309-05:00Well....it does take two to make a baby. If he tru...Well....it does take two to make a baby. If he truly did not want another child then he should have taken greater steps to prevent pregnancy. Veronicahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07832445488072035031noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-3315940223241436472017-01-02T17:06:09.505-05:002017-01-02T17:06:09.505-05:00I found all these posts reassuring and heart wrenc...I found all these posts reassuring and heart wrenching too . I have 4 kids 8,7,5 and 29 months. I've had good births and loved being pregnant. I too still have a longing fora fifth but where do you stop I thought having a 4th would stop me being broody. I'm grateful for what I have I'm 41 but still think I'd have time for one more. My hubby not keen but we'd both agree our kids make us so proud and the best thing in our lives .I feel selfish wanting any more but how do I know we won't regret this decision when we love the kids we have do dearly.More babieshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07580858627781853627noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-31254887798498708282016-12-22T20:49:53.659-05:002016-12-22T20:49:53.659-05:00I'm right there with all of you... we have nea...I'm right there with all of you... we have nearly 5 year old twins. Boy-girl twins. Our son has autism and our daughter has generalized anxiety disorder. Life is busy, sometimes overwhelming but there's so much love! I didn't go back to work after my twins were born, so money is tight and our house is small. I understand all my hubby's concerns for not wanting another child, I even agree with some of them. But I cannot turn this feeling off!! For a year now this feeling keeps rearing its head and brings back all this heart wrenching back-and-forth internal battle crap!! I wish I could let it go and just accept that he does not want another child. I wish I knew how to turn it off. But it consumes me, I feel our family is not complete yet. But I don't want to coerce someone into this. It needs to be unanimous! Melhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02878809792333314957noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-16544982217543185812016-10-30T21:54:14.457-04:002016-10-30T21:54:14.457-04:00Hello. Of course you are not too old and you are n...Hello. Of course you are not too old and you are not being selfish. I am 35 years old and many women are just beginning to have children. I wish you the best of luck in your journey to conceive. It is great that your fiance is willing to have a child. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13649849044261700597noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-70140548620554310352016-10-18T23:31:37.346-04:002016-10-18T23:31:37.346-04:00I am 39 years old, have a 6 year old daughter and ...I am 39 years old, have a 6 year old daughter and wanted a 2nd baby so much. My husband wanted us to wait and it's been now more than 3 years and nothing happened. He won't try Ivf and I resent him for that. How do I find my peace? Michelenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-20524663247625795212016-10-01T01:54:48.804-04:002016-10-01T01:54:48.804-04:00I am 40 years old and my fiancé is 48. I had child...I am 40 years old and my fiancé is 48. I had children very young. My 3 boys are 18, 22, and 23. His son and daughter are 24 and 16. All the kids are gone, doing well.. military, college, or working, except the 16 year old. I want to have a baby together. He is willing if it happens naturally. He just doesn't want to force it. Am I too old? Should I let it go? I've always wanted another baby but never thought it would be at 40. I don't know how to not want to mother again. I can't believe how many women feel the urge. We can easily afford it, both have time to be very involved. Am I selfish to want this? I'd love to experience raising a child with someone since I raised mine alone. Be able to provide a great life and great memories. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-3599814076109505542016-09-19T20:14:34.492-04:002016-09-19T20:14:34.492-04:00So let me get this straight: you would divorce a g...So let me get this straight: you would divorce a good man who is a great dad just because you want another kid? And no other reason? What's your husband's name so I can personally tell him that you wanna divorce him for not reversing his vasectomy. <br /><br /><br />This man isn't unsupportive of you and your teens. <br /><br />He isn't abusive. <br /><br />He's obviously responsible. <br /><br />He isn't asking for anything except "please no more kids we have a great family already."<br /><br />He loves and appreciates you and his teens, you stated that you're both getting your lives back on track. <br /><br />Yet you're willing to stupidly throw that all away, divorce him AND abandon your wondeful teenagers to get pregnant again to someone else - so damn every one else because its all about you. <br /><br />Got it. <br /><br />You're a VERY ungrateful, totally selfish female dog. <br /><br />Do you know how many women - especially women who survived domestic violence and other trauma from crazy ass males - WISHED they had a amazing husband that you've been immensely blessed with?! <br /><br />Seek help immediately because you're off your mental rocker lady. Better yet LEAVE your husbad for a guy willing to get you knocked up and don't look back. <br /><br />Another woman will care for him and your teenagers unselfishly since you're so self absorbed.<br /><br />When that happens- don't get mad at anyone else but yourself and I hope your husband doesn't let your sorry ass back in the damn house after that. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01700800136207504877noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-68218109932216869742016-07-03T12:14:32.292-04:002016-07-03T12:14:32.292-04:00I feel you as a mother of a 9 year old son who jus...I feel you as a mother of a 9 year old son who just wants one more...not two or three. Just a opportunity to give him one sibling. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-8322665839325744182016-07-02T01:04:53.050-04:002016-07-02T01:04:53.050-04:00I have had a strong desire to do more mothering in...I have had a strong desire to do more mothering in this life. I actually have 2 boys ages 13 and 9. I never had a maternity leave for either child, 3 days for the first and 2 weeks for the second. I am finally at a point in my life where i can quit work and be a full time mom but my husband is not on board. My hubby actually had a vasectomy 9 years ago after our 2nd child was born. He just got a reverse vasectomy (after me begging him for the past 5 years) now he just informed me he regrets getting the reversal and does not want to have a baby with me. All I can say to everyone is that no matter how much convincing u try to do, you cannot change someone's mind. Your husband has to be on board. I tried so hard for him to see things from my point of view and thought he understood but now it has only made him resent me. I am coming very close to full acceptance of this. I am grateful for what I have and I really pray that everyone here will have peace. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13649849044261700597noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-6558097655396488962016-07-02T01:04:05.884-04:002016-07-02T01:04:05.884-04:00Personally, you have to decide if this relationshi...Personally, you have to decide if this relationship is worth continuing to the next level if you have differing views. If you love him and want to get married than this is something that you have to be willing to accept. Just let him know heart to heart your feelings. I know how you are feeling and there have been times I contemplated ending my marriage over my husband not wanting another. You can also try a family counselor so that you both can be heard and the counselor can provide some good feedback for you two. Hang in there I know it's tough. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13649849044261700597noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-30555716632654286632016-06-20T13:22:40.303-04:002016-06-20T13:22:40.303-04:00How are you handling it? Is there a message board...How are you handling it? Is there a message board where people sharing these feelings can talk?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-42138841924656460372016-06-15T00:09:48.885-04:002016-06-15T00:09:48.885-04:00You cannot judge someone else's struggle! That...You cannot judge someone else's struggle! Thats THEIR life and how they feel. Everyone has stated they are grateful for the children they Do have. But your struggle is yours alone and so is theirs. Don't you dare insult them in that way. We all struggle, but our struggle will be different. How would it feel if I said you have no decency because you want to leave your marriage and throw your vows out the door? Wouldnt feel great would it? Please don't judge!!!Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02456936715496920485noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-39549056099651834672016-06-11T19:51:03.516-04:002016-06-11T19:51:03.516-04:00My boyfriend has 2 children and I have 1. He doesn...My boyfriend has 2 children and I have 1. He doesn't want more children and I do for many reasons. I don't know what to do.should I try to convince him,should I just give up the idea. I'm torn on what would be the right thing for everyone. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-48608412356284063472016-06-10T16:12:39.601-04:002016-06-10T16:12:39.601-04:00My boyfriend has two children from a previous marr...My boyfriend has two children from a previous marriage (a boy and a girl ) and I also have a son from a previous marriage. I want to have a child together more than anything, but he doesn't. What should I do? Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-80746672493370751602016-05-29T03:25:09.085-04:002016-05-29T03:25:09.085-04:00As a woman with a 10-year old and struggling with ...As a woman with a 10-year old and struggling with the decision between leaving my husband and accepting there will always be only one I find it extremely irritating and selfish that you can even dare to label your NOT having a 3rd, 4th, 5th a drama. My child will never know what having a sibling means whereas yours will. And I will never know how it is to experience mothering two children. And you will. I sometime feel I have no sense of decency compared to someone who has no children. I truly hope that you know you have no sense of decency compared to someone who wants two and will never have them. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-50586746305242125382016-04-14T00:04:32.874-04:002016-04-14T00:04:32.874-04:00I'm 35, I have three children and I can't ...I'm 35, I have three children and I can't stop thinking about having another baby! I have struggled with this for 2 years now thinking it was hormones! My husband is on board! What should I do? Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-49463699538958979502016-01-21T17:09:47.646-05:002016-01-21T17:09:47.646-05:00My husband And I have 2 teenagers we are both 36 a...My husband And I have 2 teenagers we are both 36 and met very young after our youngest was born he had a vasectomy as he had decided we were done having kids. I was fine at first but now I am so broody it's ridiculous! Everyone including him knows I want more children but he keeps saying no he's not having it reversed and now our kids are older and we are getting our life back how could I think of ruining that. It's making me so bitter that I am thinking of leaving and finding someone else to have children with it is really getting to me now.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13840964317509397112noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-30025066781810287702015-12-26T01:51:42.365-05:002015-12-26T01:51:42.365-05:00It is the same issue for me. I have always wanted...It is the same issue for me. I have always wanted 3 kids, but he has only wanted 2. We have 2 beautiful healthy kids, 6 and 4, and I have been wanting the 3rd for a while. He is completely against it. He keeps saying he will think about it, but ultimately refuses. He thinks I cam being un grateful for the 2 great kids we have. I am beginning to get upset and very bitter about it, and don't know how to turn those feelings off. He expects me to just accept his final decision on this without complaint or regrets or any negative feelings at all. Which only makes me even more upset. First he gets to have the final say about the number of kids we have, and then he gets to tell me how to feel about it as well? I want to be able to let go of feeling so bitter, but am struggling.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-29688386896162876772015-11-26T20:09:03.635-05:002015-11-26T20:09:03.635-05:00I also have been wanting another baby die a while ...I also have been wanting another baby die a while now. My husband and I have 4 boys with a set of twin girls that passed away when I was 23 weeks 4 days pregnant before our 4th son. My husband dies want another one but, he's terrified that it will be another boy which neither of us wants. Our Boys are great, don't get me wrong but that's a lot of boys and we are grateful. We honestly want a little girl badly but, we would not love him any less if it was another boy. I mention trying and he says "if you can guarantee that it will be a girl" he's only half kidding. We both want another child but the fear of having another boy is holding him back. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07818679250128717486noreply@blogger.com