tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post4101970476004666383..comments2024-03-28T21:36:55.157-04:00Comments on Love That Max : Stop the special needs mom shaming Ellen Seidmanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01433429847255621203noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-58035479470478300702017-05-17T13:28:10.505-04:002017-05-17T13:28:10.505-04:00Love your blog! Have a special needs younger teena...Love your blog! Have a special needs younger teenaged brother myself, not easy. One time when we went to Funspot with a group of friends, one of the people(An adult!)was rude to my brother, because my brother was too scare to go on the roller coasters. Got really angry at that adult, my brother has a heart mummer & klinefelter syndrome, he could had a medical emergency. Needless to say, never talk much to that adult anymore.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-19859334328809736232017-05-15T16:34:42.290-04:002017-05-15T16:34:42.290-04:00What I find hard is that my sons special needs are...What I find hard is that my sons special needs are mostly invisible, because he is very high functioning, people expect him to "act his age" because of his unseen functioning - he isnt always able to do this....and I find myself in a place where I don't know if I should swallow my pride and let people think what they want about him or my parenting, or tell the whole world that he has special needs and potentially shame him, because he would be very embarrassed by being treated or viewed differently...I don't necessarily want to put the label special needs on him everywhere we go when most of the time he can function well enough that its invisible to those who don't know....but yet then people do make assumptions that are often incorrect about him or my parenting when he is then impulsive or misses social cues etc etc . Its a no win situation. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17192596811310146051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-45201146229656876382017-05-09T22:54:53.460-04:002017-05-09T22:54:53.460-04:00See: What is wrong with people?!See: What is wrong with people?!Ellen Seidmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01433429847255621203noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-55816438633073135612017-05-09T11:22:27.865-04:002017-05-09T11:22:27.865-04:00Also: A band parent passive-aggressively insulted ...Also: A band parent passive-aggressively insulted me (told the other parents about how her children eat sushi on a regular basis and how she ended up fine* on a "eat it or starve" policy) because of my food aversions. I'm sure she feels so much better about herself after effectively bullying me for having a neurological disorder! Funny thing is, she did not say anything about the vegetarian students who likely chose to eat that way. <br /><br />*I guess she's not so fine if she felt the need to bully me for having a disability. :/Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-35640686758823603852017-05-05T14:29:10.173-04:002017-05-05T14:29:10.173-04:00Again, you have to wonder what kind of person woul...Again, you have to wonder what kind of person would say something like that! And touché on asking him what made him so awful! "We are all going through something" should be a bumper sticker. Hugs to you, mama. Ellen Seidmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01433429847255621203noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-61125080826144112422017-05-05T14:27:32.953-04:002017-05-05T14:27:32.953-04:00Whoa. Can you imagine growing up with a mean, narr...Whoa. Can you imagine growing up with a mean, narrow-minded, intolerant father like that?! His poor children. Ellen Seidmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01433429847255621203noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-9672020506337636272017-05-05T14:23:17.252-04:002017-05-05T14:23:17.252-04:00A-men, Anon!A-men, Anon!Ellen Seidmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01433429847255621203noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-22699476763248838502017-05-05T14:22:58.730-04:002017-05-05T14:22:58.730-04:00I just don't get it either. Even before I had ...I just don't get it either. Even before I had kids I never judged moms or kids having meltdowns. Ellen Seidmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01433429847255621203noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-87805535964937484422017-05-05T08:25:46.929-04:002017-05-05T08:25:46.929-04:00Wow some people are so frigging mean! I'm a ve...Wow some people are so frigging mean! I'm a very mouthy mum when I need to be so he would have been shamed in front of the whole dam restaurant and I would have made management aware of his actions what a vile person I'm so very sorry you had to go through something like that but don't let that stop you from going out to eat not many people are like that! Keep your head up xx ❤Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04768035691324762463noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-35689314348101186742017-05-04T14:33:08.819-04:002017-05-04T14:33:08.819-04:00I have been asked, point blank, by adult an adult ...I have been asked, point blank, by adult an adult total stranger when David was very overwhelmed in a store "God, What did you do to make him like that?" I could hear my heart break. I was sure she watched me turn bright red, my eyes filling with fire, smoke pouring out of my ears just like Yosemite Sam as the rage rose up inside me. I snapped "I gave birth to him, and something wrong. What's your excuse? What did your mom do to you to make you a heartless...." it rhymes with witch. I wasn't proud of my outburst, but apparently the women in line around me were, because that one earned me a round of applause. I never cease to be amazed by the polar juxtaposition of kindness and hatefulness within the human race. I have always assumed a child was tired or hungry or overwhelmed or simply freaking out for no reason, as kids are prone to do sometimes, when they are having a meltdown. I disapprove of parents who allow their children to run amok in inappropriate places, like stores & restaurants, completely unchecked-but a mother who is clearly trying to do her best, no matter if her child is ignoring her and continuing to scream like they are being murdered-those mothers always have my respect. I always see them. We are all going through something. mamamacmurtrymakesthingshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13088147006995807295noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-24104896449396351122017-05-04T11:34:10.920-04:002017-05-04T11:34:10.920-04:00I guess I'm "lucky" I as Molly is in...I guess I'm "lucky" I as Molly is in a wheelchair so it's more obvious she has CP and developmental delays, but I know what you mean. I try to smile in the face of it when I can. I specifically remember one instance leaving a baseball game in Toronto many years ago. The bottom of the 9th inning had been pretty tense - behind by one, someone got on base, followed by a walk, the crowd was getting more and more spun up and so was Molly right along with them. Then suddenly someone hit into a double-play and the game was over. The crowd deflated immediately but Molly didn't lol. It was like she had stored all the crowd's energy and now it had no place to go but out. All the way to the subway station she screeched - a high pitched, piercing scream of pure joy. All I could do was smile a big grin at people as they turned at us in shock and horror. Luckily (if you've ever tried to leave a MLB game after it's over) it was fantastic for parting the crowd - we made it to the subway station in record time! �� The one's that hurt though are the mean ones. I rarely take Molly to restaurants but we had a lengthy power outage one time and I had no choice. While we were waiting for the bill I noticed the father of the family sitting near us was actually mimicking Molly's mannerisms in order to make his family laugh. I was so dumbfounded that all I could do was stare at him incredulously. I just couldn't comprehend that someone could be that balled faced mean. Even when he knew I was looking at him he never stopped. His kids were in their early teens and I could tell they were uncomfortable but they still laughed at him (albeit a little nervously) but I couldn't fault them with the obviously horrible parental role modeling they'd received, but I have to say I've never been so hurt and angry in my life. On my way out some people who'd been waiting in line and had probably witnessed the whole thing held the door open for us and told me I was a good mom, but even that did little to help. One of the few times in 17yrs that the "baddies" got me. We still haven't been back to a restaurant since ☹️Juliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13169805542797414245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-83029829188247127592017-05-04T09:22:44.719-04:002017-05-04T09:22:44.719-04:00I've been the shamee, the shamer, the comforte...I've been the shamee, the shamer, the comfortee and only occassionally the comforter....I'm going to try my darndest to be more of a comforter, introvert that I am..mommies need to unite! Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-3523891086575368862017-05-04T08:50:22.797-04:002017-05-04T08:50:22.797-04:00I never realized just how harshly mothers judge on...I never realized just how harshly mothers judge one another until I became a mother myself and five years and two kids later I'm still baffled by the mothers who feel the need to be so negative. When I am anywhere...a store, a restaurant, etc...and I see a mom who is frustrated by her little one acting out, crying or throwing a tantrum, I always offer a smile and say "been there!" just so she knows it's ok and she's not alone. LOVE that you spoke up to that judgy mom, good for you!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com