Monday, March 11, 2013

A day of freedom


This weekend, our family had a rare day of schedule freedom. So what did we do? Got the kids a gig selling pies.

Any parents have to get used to centering their lives around their kids, especially when they're toddlers. But when you have a kid who gets a lot of therapies, life gets more regimented. Mostly, I haven't minded—just the opposite. I've always wanted to get Max as much speech, occupational and physical therapy as possible. When he was a tot, we'd take him for craniosacral therapy and hyperbaric oxygen therapy, too.

Now, Max gets therapy once a day after school. On Saturday mornings, his longtime speech therapist comes over. Sunday mornings, he goes to a great program for kids with special needs. Sabrina has her activities, too—tennis, cooking class, dancing.

It's rare to have a day with no plans and when we do, it feels like a gift. Saturday was one of those days: Therapy and activities all got cancelled, for various reasons. We woke up when we wanted to, with nothing to rush for, which felt both weird and seriously wonderful. Sometimes, I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders as a parent, but days like these take the pressure off. I felt free—of appointments, structure, responsibilities.

We were just going to loll around the house, maybe go out for dinner, when Dave's dad called. Did we want to come over? He lives a couple hours away. Usually, decide on visits months in advance. But it was gloriously sunny for March, a great day for a road trip, so off we went.

Dave's dad and his girlfriend make and sell these decadent fruit pies—apple, lemon, plum, OMG—and they run a booth at a market on weekends that we hadn't yet seen. The kids had the time of their lives punching register buttons, sampling (and more sampling) and adding up sales. They even got a salary, a whole $2.

Sabrina was so enthralled she asked if she could quit school and help Grandpa Michael sell pies.




Max's favorite pretend play when he was a tot involved cooking in a play kitchen, so this was a fantasy come true. When I gave him a dollar, he put it in the cash register and told me to take a pie. 

Oh, and he remembered to give me a receipt, too.

We were so full of pie, pizza and pickles (all from booths at the market) that we didn't even have dinner. We drove home late, our bellies full, content about a day where no plans turned out to be the plans of all.

And now, of course, I want to plan for more no-plan days.

14 comments:

  1. Next time you feel the need to convince someone that Max is just like any other kid, show them that series of pictures. Total engagement, fascination with the machinery (cash register) and appropriate use of it, slipping right into the role of pie-vendor--those pictures make BOTH your kids look like the two most typical, ordinary kids in the world.

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    1. Anon, that's exactly it: In many ways, our kids are like other kids, if only people could see past the disabilities.

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  2. I am so happy that I found your blog! From what I've read so far it seems that we have a fair bit in common and I hope that I can learn a lot from you.
    On a related note, I completely know what you mean by the freedom of unscheduled days. Going schedule-commando is my favorite! Haha. We have three sons (7, 3 and 16 mos) so it's a rarity around here too.

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    1. Welcome, Dawn. As a mom of three, I'm sure I'll have plenty to learn from YOU!

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  3. We call them "salad days" here at university in the UK. They're beautiful days that you spend with the people you want, no obligations, out in the open, having a good time but all relaxed. It's good to know you have these salad days too, because you deserve them!

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    1. Ness, in the US "salad days" refer to your youth. I've always wondered where the phrase came from, and you inspired me to Google! It's from Shakespeare's Antony and Cleopatra; as she says, "My salad days, when I was green in judgment...." Anyway, yes, we could all use more salad days either way!

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  4. Glad you enjoyed your do-nothing my favorite thing to do on do nothing day is to lay on my bed and stare at the blue sky through my bedroom window.

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    1. Nisha, if ever I am able to lay on my bed and do nothing but stare at the blue sky from the window, someone should call 911 right away because that would probably mean I was DEAD! He, he.

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  5. What a wonderful day! That sounds like so much fun. I'm slowly learning how important fun and spontaneity is in this life as mom to a child with a few extra challenges. Its so easy to get caught up in the do, do, do and forget about the just being. It looks like you guys had an awesome day just being

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    1. It really was good, I was still on a high today. Going to plan for more of that spontaneity!

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  6. Ellen -- as far as I am concerned, you glossed over the most important part of the story. Your father-in-law makes and sells HOMEMADE PIES??? AND YOU CAN HAVE THEM ANY TIME YOU WANT???? Okay, yay Max. But... PIES!!!!! PIES!!! Be still my heart!!! :-)

    Paula

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  7. Hi, I sent an email to your blog email address to see if you would be interested in an article written byt a studetn with CP at the school where I teach. She details the struggles she is having getting appropriate accomidations for the SATs. I just emailed the article.

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    1. I saw! I posted it on Facebook to see if people had advice to share, and they did—please check it out and share with Morgan.

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Thanks for sharing!