Friday, February 18, 2011

Max steps out of his comfort zone (and likes it)


This is Max's table setting. It's a perma-fixture on our kitchen table; he wants it there all the time. He keeps a matching purple bowl and plate on his bed. He sleeps with them at night, and makes sure they're aligned just so.

Max likes the familiar. A few weeks ago, we got a new phone and put the answering machine in our bedroom instead of the kitchen, where it had been for years. Max keeps asking us to bring it downstairs, where he feels it belongs. He also likes us to park in corner spots of lots. He likes to sit in corner tables at restaurants. No, actually, he only sits in corner tables at restaurants, and has been known to stare down diners who dare occupy his table. He waves his hand like a little Napoleon, ordering them to move. This is why we keep going to the same local diner on Sundays, where they save the table in the back for us.

Lately, though, Max is breaking out. This week, his school finally sent home the DVD of him at the holiday show I'd been begging to see; I'd missed it because of work and because every other year, he'd run out of the room screaming. Not this year; he beamed and sang "This Little Light of Mine," holding his mini flashlight. And then he took a bow. And I felt like the crappiest mother of the year for not being there.

Max is daring to try other new things, too. Last week, he asked us to move his chair (it's a Keekaroo) and his environmentally-incorrect tableware to a different spot at the table. He's been begging to go inside stores when we drive by, although they used to scare him. He sat at a new table at the restaurant over the weekend. It was a corner one, but still.

Clearly, the progress of our kids can't be measured by reports, charts or tests alone. It can't just be measured by an increasing number of spoken words or an improvement in movement. Progress comes in all shapes and forms—one song, one bow, one new place at a time.

17 comments:

  1. I like to park in the corner spots too :-)

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  2. How awesome! Go Max! I really enjoy following your story & little family. He seems like such a blessed child! God bless you guys, & thanks for sharing!

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  3. Those little changes add up to so much! I am happy for you all and happy for Max!

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  4. here's to trying new things! my kids also tend to like things just so, but i love when they're up for trying something else.

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  5. Way to go Max! Way to break out!

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  6. Those are kinda huge changes, Ellen! I still like to have my back away from the door and I am 43years old.

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  7. Corner table, eh? You sure he's not the boss of a crime family? They like the corner table, so they can see who's coming in the door!!

    Seriously, I am so happy that Max is pushing the envelope and expanding his boundaries. That's beyond superb!

    Don't feel bad about not being at the school assembly--you never know, if you'd been there he might have been too distracted looking at you and wanting to be with you instead of performing.

    I keep wondering about those stem cells....his progress is just amazing. Every day a new achievement!

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  8. Sometimes little changes can be easy to miss - this reminds me to keep an eye out for them and celebrate every last one. Way to go Max!

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  9. Our son likes very few foods. He loves macaroni but won't eat other pasta. The other day he order penne alfredo at the restaurant and ATE it. I was very excited. I am also very excited for Max. Your posts have made our family's journey easier. Thanks a bunch.

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  10. Yay, penne Alfredo!

    Felicia, we'll never know if the stem cells are behind the progress or not. Either way, I'LL TAKE IT!!!

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  11. that's great!!! way to go, max! :-)

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  12. My three girls and I watched the video of Max dancing on the bed and they all really liked it. When it was over, my seven year old said, "Max is really the star of Ellen's life." I know she is right.

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  13. And they all come at once don't they? I have noticed that when my daughter seems to "get it" she does so in multiple aspects all at once. She may then have a period where she doesn't make any progress. It is very interesting.

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Thanks for sharing!