Thursday, January 15, 2009

Life BC (before children)


Glam, weren't we?

Dave took me out for sushi last night to celebrate our eighth wedding anniversary. Before I left work to meet him, someone asked why we got married in January. That's easy: We wanted a nice-sized wedding and they have sweet deals in January. (And, no, I'm not always that practical.)

Before we had kids, Dave and I used to go out all the time. We saw every good movie, went to museums and the theater, hit dance clubs, took drives to random interesting places or just hung with friends. We do a lot less of that now. For years, I volunteered on Thursday evenings in the pediatric playroom of a hospital that treats cancer. The kids were easy to be around—they just wanted to be kids and play, and after awhile I got used to seeing them bald and hooked up to IVs. It was the parents who were hard to take, I could always sense their sadness. I miss volunteering, and I'd like to do a weekend project at some point soon.

Some other things I miss about life before children:
• The obvious: No worrying about biggie stuff. Like, will Max talk? Will he be able to better use his hands? You get the point.
• A neat living room. A neat kitchen. A neat bedroom. A neat bathroom. A neat anywhere.
• Long showers where nobody's pulling back the curtain and saying "Hi, Mommy!"
• Blasting Bruce in the house at full volume.
• Lazy Sundays. Some weekends, I'd be grateful for a lazy 10 minutes.

Got something you miss?

11 comments:

  1. Oh I don't remember life without children! Jonathan came into the picture a year after Tony and I started dating...you do the math. I do remember life being a bit easier though...and not so scary!

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  2. LOL! I don't know who I'd be without "Mom" as a title.
    Great post.

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  3. Oh, yea- I left you a blog award on my blog.

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  4. I miss my books. I still have them, but they take a LONG time to get through now. I miss sleeping in and naps. And the carefree lack of worrying about the big things. I'm so with you on the big things. And the quiet. Where did it go? Why is there always noise here?

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  5. definitely sleeping in as late as i want to....i really miss that.

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  6. Not really. I guess we struggled so long to even have a child that none of the other stuff matters much anymore. If I had to pick something I guess it would be the worry about Bennett's future

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  7. Thanks so much, Jessica. That was sweet. And, I agree with you all--I miss reading books, too, and sleeping till whenever I wanted to. Barbara, I know you've been through a lot, I can understand why you don't think that much about life pre-Bennett. Getting sentimental probably isn't an issue for a lot of us--who has the time?!

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  8. Oh, I miss manicures that aren't ruined because I have to jump up and stop Daniel's latest wrecking job on the house! Like you, I also miss not worrying about the big stuff. Last but not least, I miss having nothing but lipstick, my cell phone, and other "me" items in the purse that now holds Daniel's Bob Books and crayons when we go out.
    But would I go back to my old life for even a minute? Never. I'll take the toddler antics, hospital/therapy appointments, and frequent worrying as long as I get to keep my little miracle.

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  9. Hi! New to your blog, linked through someone else's blog a while back (last week? last year?)

    I miss hot coffee. The coffee gets made, it gets poured, someone needs juice, someone pulls someone's hair, someone needs their heiny wiped ... I wash my hands a bazillion times, reach for my coffee and it's cold. Pour it down the drain, refill, repeat.

    Oh, and I miss sleep. And books. And writing. And my husband. I miss all the time I now spend in meetings at the school and sitting in doctors' waiting rooms. I LOVE my kids, but I miss my life.

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  10. I totally cracked up at the shower item....I don't know the last time I took a shower without Henry peeking around the edge of the curtain and saying "hold my hand!" (which actually means hold is and i'll pull you wherever i'd like you to go). i miss neatness and order...though i'm not even that orderly...and time to ponder.

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  11. Well I tried to leave a msg and the websit went crazy. I put I miss going out to dinner whenever I wanted, movies, whisking away on vacation, being skinny, and being naughty throughout the house...ha ha ha! u asked!
    I love being a mom though

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Thanks for sharing!



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