tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post2873686262451456359..comments2024-03-28T21:36:55.157-04:00Comments on Love That Max : Crowdsourcing: How do you deal when your child digs in his heels?Ellen Seidmanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01433429847255621203noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-81793669382303098512017-10-11T09:03:51.888-04:002017-10-11T09:03:51.888-04:00Another thing I will do with Luke is to remind him...Another thing I will do with Luke is to remind him of the rules (he clearly understands that rules are to be followed). In this case the rule would be something along the lines of only the students and teachers get to stay in the class, everyone else (moms, dads, brothers, ...) are visitors and they have to leave after taking the student. Sometimes it appears that Luke needs to know why.<br />Janetnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-14718028753409575942017-10-10T21:26:57.434-04:002017-10-10T21:26:57.434-04:00What you did was perfect. The best message you can...What you did was perfect. The best message you can send is " This behavior will not get you anything". Not a big reaction. Not alot of attention. Not a discussion. Not a distraction. Nothing other then what l absolutely need to get you to stop. There is no need for another consequence. <br /><br />The only thing I'd say is "I didn't like you not leaving when I told you to go". Do NOT get caught up in a diversion issue like the yelling. Ignore it.Anniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14474266910424269151noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-19423600723035960302017-10-10T12:36:34.637-04:002017-10-10T12:36:34.637-04:00I try and calmly and quietly talk him out of it, t...I try and calmly and quietly talk him out of it, then I say I understand what you want but we need to come out here to talk about it, I can usually get him to understand if I can go to an environment which he is not distracted in. Hugs to you as it is not easy<br /><br />gramjenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07400081738417553685noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-41327469014056642342017-10-10T12:02:51.907-04:002017-10-10T12:02:51.907-04:00We haven't encountered this too much yet, but ...We haven't encountered this too much yet, but I definitely enjoyed the story :)<br /><br /><br />Paige<br />http://thehappyflammily.comPaige Flammhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12611640192527041942noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-17388606762873872882017-10-10T09:28:24.008-04:002017-10-10T09:28:24.008-04:00The part that you did great was not giving in. You...The part that you did great was not giving in. You didn't bribe(e.g. lets go get a doughnut!). With my almost-15-year-old, if I give on once he will expect it all the time. This is really, really hard for me to do. Luke is now over 5' 5" and he likes to push is 5' 2" sister's buttons (I call it being twerpy towards her). When I ask he will readily admit doing.<br /><br />Part of the issue is not being able to predict all possible things. You do a great job of preparing Max. But who would have thought this one?! <br /><br />Is it time to start having consequences along the lines of I will give you to the count of 3, if you choose not to leave at that point then you will loose something. This is something you can talk with Max about in a generic way using preschool as an example. <br /><br />One final thought - I think some of this is hard with Max/Luke because of all of those times when you (me) would have given anything for our kids to express a desire/want in an articulate manner. Janetnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-401303964563152307.post-8478609558128721762017-10-10T07:36:51.323-04:002017-10-10T07:36:51.323-04:00One thing I'd start with is *not* laughing at ...One thing I'd start with is *not* laughing at Max's teen behaviour/sass. Would you laugh if it was Sabrina?<br /><br />Or, frankly, how would you react if it was Ben?<br /><br />I don't know if it would make a difference, but it could help to make Max give a proper, sincere apology. Even if he doesn't *feel* sincere about it (which wouldn't be unusual for a kid/teen), it still teaches him the polite, expected social acknowledgement to inappropriate behaviour, and this could help him in many situations in life.<br /><br />These are just suggestions... Feel free to ignore!Isaacnoreply@blogger.com