Monday, January 17, 2011

Two kinds of milestones, all kinds of amazing


Sabrina walked into my bedroom this morning with an armful of Pull-Ups and announced that she was done wearing them at night.

"Are you sure?" I asked. When we were at the doctor a few weeks ago for her annual checkup, I'd asked if it was OK that she was still wearing them, given that she's almost 6, and he basically said whatever worked was cool.

"Yes!" Sabrina said, emphatically. "I'm not wearing them anymore." She's like me in that way: Once she sets her mind to something, she does it.

I'm happy, and excited to stop shelling out money for her diapers, but I'm kind of melancholy about this, too; it's the end of a phase in her life. Max, meanwhile, is still in Pull-Ups for the unforeseeable future. When he gets out of them, we will be having a major celebration—I am talking diaper-burning party. OK, just one diaper will be burned, and then we will donate the rest to a local shelter, like I'm planning to do with Sabrina's extras.

Sabrina's milestones have come upon us fast and unexpectedly; one day she was pulling to stand and the next week, she took her next steps. One day she was babbling away in that baby language that sounds like she's speaking perfect Swahili and the next, words came. One day she decided to dress herself. One day she brushed her teeth by herself. One day, she made her bed (although, sadly, that's not a habit). These milestones delight with their unannounced arrival and the speed at which they descend upon us. We're thrilled, yet we take them for granted.

Max's milestones have been wholly different. Most of them have happened after serious effort on his part, his therapists' and ours. They're victories, each and every one, doubly wondrous because there was no guarantee he'd achieve them. And the milestones that spring up without any doing, like when he recently started rhyming? Those seem downright miraculous.

That's the mix of milestones we experience in our family. And they're all pretty amazing.

What sort of milestones (or mini-stones) have you been seeing lately?

19 comments:

  1. A few weeks ago at 14 months old my boy sat up! I didn't believe it would happen (I'm such a pessimist). Happy days.

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  2. My almost 4yr old finally learned how to use a straw! We are no longer chained to our sippie cups! Yeah!

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  3. My 2 year old has been mimicking sounds! It's awesome!

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  4. Lots of new words. And sounds.

    Each one of our milestones FEELS like it takes a million tiny steps to get there. . . its funny, friends with typical kiddos see pictures of Sam starting to stand supported and are like, "she's so close to walking," and I think, "you don't GET this." They don't.

    Even though she's standing, walking feels so far away. Thank you for the reminder that mini-stones count too. Sometimes, I lose sight of that in the willing and wanting the next big thing to happen.

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  5. On Saturday Marley learned to go from laying on the floor to sitting! She is so proud of herself and we are too! We are learning to simply take joy in the progression and not just the milestones. She's an excellent teacher!

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  6. We haven't reached the pull-up burning milestone, yet, but there have been so many others. I really do appreciate every one.

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  7. Congratulations to Sabrina! You might want to get hold of a few of these saddle style mattress covers-- http://www.drugstore.com/my-kids-first-cotton-top-mattress-protector-saddle-style-34x36/qxp269748protectors --just in case there's a bit of backsliding--they are so easy to whip on and off if you have an accident because they go on top of the sheet. I swear by them (I never paid this much for them but the link is what they look like, basically-and they have waterproofing on one side). We don't need these so much anymore, but they're great when you need 'em. We're also seeing calm days, fewer tantrums, less chaos and very little whining or crying for little or no reason. Routines help, trauma fades, and time heals all wounds, I guess. Life is maybe a bit slow and boring lately, but boring is good!

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  8. These are the most awesome comments to read before I crash, I am going to sleep very happy!

    Momttorney, I've also had friends who haven't understood how BIG the little things can be, like why Max isolating one finger to use his iPad was huge. I've learned to explain things to them, I no longer get upset about it.

    Felicia, I am with you on the boring!!! And the routines. I'm going to live dangerously and see how things go sans the safety sheet. Famous last words.

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  9. we use the sheets even with the pull-ups, they're not 100%.
    Agree with the mini-stones thing, that's why blogs about Special kids are so good to read and comment on, the community thing.
    Ashley's busting mini-stones like mad at the moment. He's using words deliberately, becoming clearer in his diction, standing taller, using his spoon to clear the plate, walking further and saying thank you (well Gagoo) at just the right times.
    Well done Sabrina! and well done the Mini-Stone Kids too. :)

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  10. Owen pulled himself up to standing this week for the first time! As his first birthday approaches in a few weeks, I can't help but marvel at my wondrous boy, and how much they told us he might never be able to accomplish because of the stroke! He has a long way to go, but his determination and spirit keep ME going every day...

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  11. My A had major ortho surgery this fall on her femurs and so our mini-stones are seeing her get back to pre-op state with her walking/mobility. She can now stand long enough for me to help her with pulling her pants up/down for toileting which has been huge in our house. Every little bit is a miracle and definately celebrated.
    Congrats to Sabrina!

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  12. Momttorney I have dealt with that as well. A pic of my son standing on his own gets a "He'll be walking soon". I can only hope is how I respond but no they don't get it!

    My son can now stand for up to a minute unassisted! We've had him on Methyl B12 and he seems to be babbling more. He also walked without much complaint (he usually hates walking and always complains) the other day at a park and is doing it more and more even indoors! He's also trying to stand up on his own.

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  13. It's true -- we miss out on the joy of the small steps when we're so overfocused on the big ones. A couple of mini stones for Ben:

    He signed "good night" to all the people leaving the swimming pool last night.

    He is doing some simple language homework his school is sending home to appease me. That includes some writing (he has never been able to write functionally because of his fine motor problems)

    When I asked him to write something on the computer that he likes, he immediately wrote "zoo."

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  14. Love reading everyone's mile and mini stones! I'm still waiting for my kids to sleep past 6am - hope it happens b4 their teenagers.

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  15. Moe just started pretending to talk on the phone. Not sure if it is pretend play or just imitating his sister, but either way, it's awesome!

    Congrats to everyone else on their achievements. We do tend to appreciate them so much more when they are hard-won.

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  16. You might like these "inchstones" by JoyMama.

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  17. Okay, I forgot the link:
    http://elvis-sightings.blogspot.com/2011/01/inchstones.html

    (It's because I am old.)

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  18. We do understand these milestones. And love them. YAY!

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  19. My almost 2 year old son who has left hemiplegic CP has recently started trying to hold his straw cup with both hands instead of just his right! And he also started turning pages with his left hand - hooray!

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Thanks for sharing!



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